A Lesson In Human Relations

An interesting conundrum, posed this evening by a good friend, after a night on the town:

Say you're enjoying a few beverages at your local watering hole, and they've begun to make their way through your system. You make your way to the gentleman's lavatory to evacuate the rented suds, and you find yourself posted up next to a fellow drinker. Let's say this establishment has decided in it's wisdom as a purveyor of sorrow-drowning (and decidedly not funtional interior design) to install the type of urinal that terminates at the floor. Now, while the urinals are themselves self-contained, the extended travel from slightly-below-belt-level to floor exacerbates the existing issue of splatter. Let's also say that there's no courtesy barrier between said evacuation stations.

Now, the gentleman next to you commences his relief, and as you do the same, you suddenly feel a dappling of liquid on your bare lower leg (it's June, the friend in question was wearing short-pants.) How do you react to such a situation? I see three distinct scenarios:

1. You go with what I would imagine would be most people's first instinct, and confront the guy: "Hey arsehole, quit pissing on my leg!" This could of course lead to an ugly interaction, possibly even fisticuffs, depending on the relative levels of inebriation, the tempraments of the involved parites, etc. Generally, bad news bears.

2. You ask the gentleman to kindly redirect his business to the other side of the conference room. This could lead to either a sincere apology and repositioning, a sarcastic "Excuse me" and general awkwardness, or an threats of an unmitigated biological assault upon the speaker's current position.

3. You take the "shock and awe" approach, and respond in kind. You're not exactly winning hearts and minds, but with some luck, "Mission Accomplished." Of course, now you're likely mired in a protracted pissing contest (literally, in this case.) You spend an inordinate amount of time attempting to extract yourself, and no one ends up winning.

4. You say/do nothing. You head back to the bar with pee on your leg.

What say you, sad bastards?

Sad Bastards Concert Series: Sunset Rubdown

my girl wants to party all the time, party all the time, party all the tiiiiiiiiime...

Didn't get to see the Lakers win the NBA finals last night because I was at the Black Cat watching Sunset Rubdown.

It was all good though; I enjoyed the music and their keyboardist could catch it like Carlton Fisk. Seriously, she's like a younger, hotter version of Melissa Auf der Maur.

Anyhow, besides the keyboardist, the best part of the show were these hecklers standing near me. At one point they asked Spencer to play "Party All The Time" by Eddie Murphy. I don't think he saw the humour in it. I think that he should probably talk to Brandon Butler about how to deal with hecklers with style. Now that guy has serious stage banter skills.

Sad Bastards Concert Series: TV On The Radio

Wolf Like Me

Drove down south last week to see TV On The Radio at the National. Good show and a nice venue; I couldn't believe I was in downtown Richmond. Well, I could after the show when I was driving down Broad Street and wondering if a part of my car might actually break off due to the preponderance of potholes and generally shitty paving.

Afterwards, I crashed on SBDN's couch for two hours before driving back north to DC and going to work.

Allow myself to introduce.....myself

Greetings, Bastards, SBMF here. Our fearless leader has bestowed upon me the privilege of contributing to this humble corner of the interwebs. Or, he's lazy and doesn't want to have to contribute as often as he already doesn't. For those who don't know (i.e., everyone other than SBs -N1, UK, AP, and CS), I'm the first legacy member of the SBSC (as SBUK has the honor of being my brother), aka Youngblood, as well as the Ambassador-at-Large. I'll try to post some thoughts whenever I have any worth sharing, or if I'm just drunk and bored (can't promise which will be more frequent). I have strong proclivities towards sonic brutality, tasty and delicious brewed/distilled beverages, feats of impressive athleticism, and soul-crushing misery. Hope you enjoy.

Peace and misery.